Thursday, August 25, 2016

Service Talk

President Snow was journeying through Iowa in February of 1846.  The weather was difficult and they struggled through rain, snow, and mud.  One day they ran into a gentleman who needed help carrying his trunk.  There was no room in President's Snows wagon, but they did not turn him away and made room for his stuff.

That next day, the axle on their wagon broke.  They were miles from the nearest house and the nearest town with no way to fix the wagon.  Yet, they were blessed to find this gentleman who they hadn't turned away was a wagon maker and fixed the axle better than it had been to start with.

By doing this small act of service, President Snow and his family were blessed to have the answer to their problems when they arrived.

God does notice us and our problems.  He watches over us.  But it is usually through another person that He meets our needs.  And usually by meeting someone else’s needs, our own needs are met. Whether those needs be physical, spiritual, or emotional.

If there is anything that life and service teaches, it is that helping those around us and spending our time on someone else’s' needs cures our sadness and mutes our own troubles.  Service is a sure guide to happiness. 

Jesus said “Whosever will save his life shall lose it: and whosever will lose his life for my sake shall find it.” (Matthew 16:25)

The greatest spiritual blessing comes from helping another.  If you want to be miserable, just harbor hate for a brother, and if you want to hate, just do your brother some injury.  But if you would be happy, remder a kind service, make somebody else happy.

There's a story that comes from the life of President Monson that shows how he had a wise mother who taught him the joys of service at a very young age.

"Sunday dinner was a big event in the Monson home, featuring roast beef with gravy and mashed potatoes. On Monday the family ate leftovers from Sunday dinner. On Tuesday they had stew from the end of the roast. Wednesday they had pork chops, and on Thursday a sirloin steak that fed everyone at the table. Friday was lamb chops or fish, and Saturday link-sausage sandwiches. Variations included Lima beans and ham one night, homemade meat pies another. Chopped fruit salad with marshmallows was a favorite, as was rice pudding. Gladys was known for her cakes. She often tinted each layer a different color—green on the bottom, pink in the middle, and yellow on the top—and covered the whole cake with thick chocolate frosting. Even Old Bob got one of Gladys’s cakes for his ninetieth birthday, with nine candles, one for each decade."

"Every Sunday Gladys would prepare a plate of food for Old Bob; before the family sat down to dinner, she would send Tommy off with the plate. One Sunday he asked, “Why don’t I take it down later?”


"His mother responded, “You do what I say, and your food will taste better.”


"He wasn’t sure what she meant, but he headed off for Old Bob’s, waiting anxiously as aged feet brought his neighbor to the door. Bob reached for a dime to reward the delivery boy. “Oh, Mr. Dicks,” said Tommy, “I wouldn’t want to take your money. My mother would tan my hide.”


“My boy, you have a wonderful mother,” Bob said as he patted Tommy’s blond hair."


"When Tommy got back, his dinner did taste better. “I didn’t realize,” he recalls, “I was learning a most powerful and important lesson about caring for those less fortunate.”

Joseph Smith's favorite hymn, A Poor Wayfaring Man of Grief, illustrates this wonderfully, especially verses two and five.

2. Once, when my scanty meal was spread,
He entered; not a word he spake,
Just perishing for want of bread.
I gave him all; he blessed it, brake,
And ate, but gave me part again.
Mine was an angel's portion then,
For while I fed with eager haste,
The crust was manna to my taste.

5. Stript, wounded, beaten nigh to death,
I found him by the highway side.
I roused his pulse, brought back his breath,
Revived his spirit, and supplied
Wine, oil, refreshment--he was healed.
I had myself a wound concealed,
But from that hour forgot the smart,
And peace bound up my broken heart.

When our acts of service are truly selfless and doesn't benefit us in any direct way, the heavens seem to see this and reflect it.

While big efforts and service are noteworthy and needed in some cases, none of us can overestimate the power of a few kind words in some one's day.  Small acts of service add up quickly and we have the opportunity to do them every single day, especially within our own family.


President Howard W Hunter said “Every act of service is important in God’s eyes, no matter how unheralded or inconspicuous.”

"We have been sent into the world to do good to others; and in doing good to others we do good to ourselves. We should always keep this in view, the husband in reference to his wife, the wife in reference to her husband, the children in reference to their parents, and the parents in reference to their children. There is always opportunity to do good to one another."

President Snow describes a heightened sense of others around us as godliness:

"We have just got to feel … that there are other people besides ourselves; we have got to look into the hearts and feelings of others, and become more godly than what we are now."

When we get to the other side of the veil, we will remember each other and remember the feeling of love, affection and friendship that we may not remember now.

"We are of the same Father in the celestial worlds. … If we knew each other as we should, … our sympathies would be excited more than they are at the present time, and there would be a desire on the part of every individual to study in their own minds how they might do their brethren good, how they might alleviate their sorrows and build them up in truth, how [they might] remove the darkness from their minds. If we understand each other and the real relationship which we hold to each other, we should feel different from what we do; but this knowledge can be obtained only as we obtain the Spirit of life, and as we are desirous of building each other up in righteousness."

The sign at the railroad crossing that warns us to stop, look, and listen could be a guide for our lives.  We should Stop as we rush through life.  Look for all the friendly, thoughtful, courteous things we can do, and all the little needs that we can fill.  Listen to others and learn of their hopes and problems so that we will be able to contribute in little ways to their success and their happiness.

One of the fruits of the Spirit is to cause us to be more interested in each other and more aware and concerned one for each other.  

"Be upright, just and merciful, exercising a spirit of nobility and godliness in all your intentions and resolutions—in all your acts and dealings. Cultivate a spirit of charity; be ready to do for others more than you would expect from them if circumstances were reversed. Be ambitious to be great, not in the estimation of the worldly minded, but in the eyes of God, and to be great in this sense, “Love the Lord our God with all your might, mind and strength, and your neighbor as yourself.” You must love mankind because they are your brethren, the offspring of God. Pray diligently for this spirit of philanthropy, this expansion of thought and feeling, and for power and ability to labor earnestly in the interest of Messiah’s kingdom."

The church is set up for us to help and serve one another. This church is God’s Church, which is so perfectly organized that every man and every woman, every child, may have an opportunity to do something good form somebody else.

It is the obligation of our priesthood members, it is the responsibility of our auxiliary organizations and of every member to serve and do God’s will.

Every act of service is important from the Relief Society president, to the Bishop, to the primary teacher, to the deacons who pass the Sacrament, to the members who clean the church each week. If we do service, and the more we do it, the more we shall become convinced that it is the work of God.

“President J. Reuben Clark said “In the service of the Lord, it is not where you serve but how.  In the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, one takes the place to which one is duly called, which place one neither seeks nor declines.”

This lesson is expressed in another way in the poem by Meade McGuire,

“Father, where shall I work today?
And my love flowed warm and free.
Then He pointed out a tiny spot
And said, “Tend that for me.”
I answered quickly, “Oh no, no that!”
Why, no one would ever see,
No matter how well my work was done
No that little place for me.”
And the word He spoke, it was not stern;
He answered me tenderly;
“Ah little one, search that heart of thine.
Art thou working or them or for me?
Nazareth was a little place,
And so was Galilee.”

King Benjamin declared “Behold I say unto you that because I said unto you that I had spent my days in your service, I do not desire to boast, for I have only been in the service of God.  And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that he may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God.
(Mosiah 2: 16-17)
 
 As we cultivate more love and service within our own lives, homes, and hearts, and  If we look for service opportunities and pray for new ones, we will draw closer to our Heavenly Father and be more like His son, Jesus Christ.

Marriage-- an Eternal Partnership

"The entire theology of our restored gospel centers on families and on the new and everlasting covenant of marriage.  In the church...we believe in premortal life where we all lived as literal spirit children of God our Heavenly Father.  We believe that we were and still are, members of His family." (Elder L. Tom Perry)

because of the importance of families, they are central to God's plan for the eternal destiny of His children.

The first presidency of the church has proclaimed that "marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the creators plan for the eternal destiny of His children.

The Lord set the example for eternal marriage when he married Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden when they were still immortal marriage was never intended to be a temporary contract.  It was always intended to be eternally binding.

Just as baptism is a commandment of the Lord, so is temple marriage....It is part of our destiny, we cannot fulfill our ultimate arms without it.

** Choose sides.  Cheap temporary vs nice long lasting which would you rather have? **

Set up a place setting on one side of the table with glass/china place setting.  The other side has cheap paper place setting.

If you were having a dinner with your Father in Heaven, which place setting would you rather have him come to dinner with?



Video: Marriage is sacred by Russel M. Nelson

You wouldn't accept a worldly form of baptism, would you?  God has his mode of baptism-- by immersion by one who holds the priesthood authority.  Then why would you choose a worldly form of marriage?  he has his mode of marriage also-- it is a temple marriage.

Of all the combinations of human relationships, the only one that can result in exaltation and eternal progression is the relationship found in the eternal marriage of a man and a woman.

To be fully exalted requires a couple made up of a man and a woman.  Individuals do not become God, only couples can do that. Men and women are not complete without each other. We each have traits that must be honed and developed.  women need men, and men need women in order to become perfect.

Deciding who to Marry

** Looking for a mate board activity

If you had to start all over again, what are the qualities you would choose in a mate?

This is the church of Jesus Christ, not the church of married or singles or any other group of individual.  The gospel we preach is the gospel of Jesus Christ, which encompasses all the saving ordinances and covenants necessary to save and exalt every individual who is willing to accept Christ and keep the commandments.

No blessing, including that of eternal marriage and an eternal family will be denied to any worthy individual. If you are not married, do not worry.  The Lord is mindful of you.  If you are faithful, all blessings will be yours.

This may be a real test of faith, but the faith required to live according to that belief will lead you in only good directions.  You will fill your life with meaningful and worthwhile activities that will bless you and all those within your sphere of influence.

Building a Successful Marriage

Having a great marriage does not happen by accident.  Marriage is a learned behavior.  Our conscious effort, not instinct, not being able to read minds, determines our success.

Marriage is not so much about marrying the right person, as it is about "being the right person."

Your spouse is your compliment, your partner, your best friend.  That means he will not think or act like you.  He has the skills and talents that you lack, just as you have what he is lacking.

In order to become "one" you will have to negotiate and concede, give and sacrifice, love unconditially and accept love when you may feel unlovable.

The conscious effort to do one's part, is the greatest element contribution to success in a marriage.

While marriage involves two people, it largely depends upon each individual if it is to be a success.  We have to individually give it our all.  We have to individually be our bet each and every day. 

Think about the couples that you admire most, those who have learned to work together, support each other and adore and admire each other.

Does this mean these couples do not have faults?  Or do their partners choose to keep their "eyes have closed" to them?

The bible tells us "Charity suffereth long and is kind."  That kind of love, the kind that is not taken lightly, not terminated at pleasure and thrown away like disposable (paper) marriage, but which faces life's little difficulties hand in hand enterwining the souls, is the ultimate expression of human happiness.

We must continually love everyday and that means continual courtship.

President Hinkley has said "I am satisfied that happiness in marriage...is an anxious concern for the comfort and well being of one's companion.  Any man (or woman) who will make his wife's (or her husbands) comfort their first concern will stay in love throughout their lives and through the eternities."


Charity:
Most partners have imperfections.  None of us are perfect.

"Perhaps any of us could get along with perfect people, but our task is to get along with imperfect people."  Richard L. Evans

Fidelity:

"In the scriptures we fid only two situations in which we are commanded to love with all our hearts.  We are commanded "though shalt love the Lord thy God with all they heart (Matthew 22:37) and "Thou shalt love they wife (husband) with all they heart. (D&C 42:22)

When the Lord says all thy heart is allows for no sharing or dividing nor depriving"  Spencer W. Kimball

Our personal exaltation depends on our relationship with our spouse.  If we haven't learned to become one as a couple, then we will never be truly happy in an eternal marriage.

This makes your spouse the most important person in your life, more important than any other family member, more important than any activity, job, or hobby.



Other Quotes:




"When we speak of marriage as a partnership, let us speak of marriage as a full partnership.  We do not want our LDS women to be silent partners of limited partners in that eternal assignment.  Please be a contribution and full partner."  President Kimball

"When husband and wives become one, they do not lose their individuality.  Being one does not mean having the same interests and talents.  Much of the joy in marriage comes from the different interests and perspectives of the partners.  While unity in goals and devotion is essential, individuality in other areas lends strength to a marriage."  Come Follow Me #4 page 107

"If a man marry a wife by...the new and everlasting covenant...by him who is anointed...and if (they" abide in (the Lord's) convenant...it...shall be of full force when they are out of the world."  D&C 132:19

"You are under no obligation to accept a proposal from someone unworthy of you for fear you will fail of your blessings...the Lord knows the intent of your hearts, and in His own due time He will reward you with opportunities made possible through temple ordinances..."  President Howard B Lee

"In the Church, I believe there is a destinct need to develop confidence in the individual, not as he or she should fit into some culturally defined timeline but as he or she follows personal revelations...it is important to have confidence that other people are doing right...and have unique offerings we need." Catherine Edward in 'Having Faith in God's Timeline'

While marriage involves two people, it largely depends on each individual if it so be a success.  We have to individually chose to accept and live the gospel covenants.  We have to individually give it our all.  If we do, no blessing will be denied to us.

Specific actions to strengthen a marriage...  (Russel M. Nelson)
     Appreciate:
           "as grateful partners look for the good in each other, wives and husbands will strive to become the persons described in those compliments"
     Communicate
           strive to elevate and motivate
     Contemplate
           allows to anticipate and resonate with each other and the Lord

Commitment is a binding fore in a good marriage.  Emotions come and go.  One day we may see the person we love as all things perfect and desirable.  Another day irritations or conflicts may bring us to the point of dislike for the same person.  Emotions may fluctuate but loyalty does not.  If commitment is firm, we do not give up or desert a relationship when adverse circumstances occur.  (Come Follow Me #4 p.106)

Benefits of an Eternal Marriage:
     1. We know our marriage can last forever.  Death can only part us temporarily, so we work harder to have a happy marriage.
     2. Our family relationships continue throughout eternity  We teach and train our children carefully, we show greater patience, and love for a happier home.
     3. Because we have been married in God's way, we have an outpouring of the Spirit on our marriage.


Handout:
Bag with 2 kisses, 2 hugs, and a mini Snickers


Marriage for Eternity with Lyrics: